Designing Your "Enough" Number: A Nervous System-Based Wealth Plan

"I'll feel safe when I make more. When I hit X amount, I'll finally relax."

Then you hit the number—and your nervous system didn't get the memo.

Sound familiar?

Most high-achieving women never actually define what enough means. So they keep living in a vague cloud of "not there yet," even as their life objectively improves.

The bank account grows. The opportunities expand. But the anxiety? It stays exactly the same.

That's not because you're broken. It's because your brain needs a specific target to tag as "safe."

The Hidden Cost of Money Stress

Money stress isn't just uncomfortable—it's expensive from a brain energy standpoint.

Recent research on financial scarcity shows that when we're under money stress—even just being reminded of financial problems—it can reduce our mental bandwidth and make it harder to plan, focus, and make thoughtful decisions.

In other words, that loop playing in your head—"How am I going to make this work?"—is not free.

It's pulling focus away from:

• Creativity

• Strategy

• Long-term thinking

And keeping you stuck in:

• Short-term reacting

• Firefighting

• Doom-scrolling your bank app

When you never define enough, your brain can't ever tag the situation as "safe now." So it stays in a low-level state of alert, even if the numbers are better than they've ever been.

We're going to change that.

The Three Numbers Framework

Grab a notebook. We're going to define three monthly income numbers—not forever-locked goals, just current best versions.

1. Your Safety Number

This is the number where your basic needs are covered. Your non-negotiables are funded. Your nervous system can exhale a bit.

Think:

• Housing, utilities

• Basic food, transportation

• Minimum debt payments

• Essential healthcare

• A very small "life happens" buffer

Ask yourself: What is the monthly number where, if this were consistently coming in, my system would stop feeling like every bill is an emergency?

Write that number down.

2. Your Stability Number

This is safety plus breathing room. You're not just surviving—you're supported.

Add in:

• Reasonable lifestyle upgrades

• More generous grocery/eating out budget

• A little travel or experiences

• More consistent savings

• A buffer for kids, pets, hobbies

Ask yourself: What monthly number feels like "I'm okay. My life is resourced and I'm not constantly choosing between my needs"?

Write that number down.

3. Your Expansion Number

This is your next-level number. The number where you can invest, give more, buy back time through support, and take bolder moves with less stress.

Ask yourself: What's the monthly number where I could play, invest, and give from overflow without it feeling ridiculous or like a fantasy?

Write that down.

This is not about impressing anybody. This is about being honest.

The Nervous System Reality Check

Now we're going to reality-check those numbers—not against the market, but against your nervous system.

Take your safety number. Say it out loud: "My safety number is $X per month."

Notice your body:

• Does your belly soften or clench?

• Does your chest expand or tighten?

• Do you feel a sense of relief?

• Or does even that number feel impossible?

Now do the same thing with your stability number. And your expansion number.

You're listening for three things:

1. Collapse: "That's impossible. No freaking way."

2. Neutrality: "Yeah, that could happen."

3. Quiet Excitement: "That would change things."

Research on stress and decision-making tells us that when we're highly activated, our brains default to short-term survival choices. When we're more regulated, we regain access to long-term strategic thinking.

So this check-in matters.

If your expansion number sends your system into shutdown, it doesn't mean it's wrong. It just means we don't build your next 90 days around it.

We build your next moves around the highest number that feels possible and safe enough right now, and we train your system from there.

Where Are You Now?

Look at all three numbers together: safety, stability, expansion.

Then ask: Where am I now? Honestly.

If you're below your safety number:

That's not a moral failure. It just tells us we're still in a chapter where the focus is:

• Stabilization

• Income consistency

• Reducing chaos

• Slowing leaks

If you're between safety and stability:

We're working on:

• Strengthening the floor

• Freeing up some space

If you're approaching or already at your expansion number:

The work often shifts from "make more" to "hold, manage, and direct more without burning out."

What's Your One Lever?

Wherever you are, ask:

What's one lever—just one—I can pull in the next 30 to 60 days that moves me closer to my next number?

Is that lever:

• Earning more?

• Spending differently?

• Saying no to something that drains profits or energy?

• Asking for or designing a change at work?

Small but concrete.

The Counterintuitive Practice: Living "As If"

Here's the counterintuitive practice:

Even if you're not yet at your safety number, I want you to experiment with living as if you are emotionally already there.

What does that mean?

It means asking yourself: If I deeply believed my safety number was secured and on its way, how would I make decisions differently?

Maybe you would:

• Stop saying yes to panic projects just for quick cash

• Stop undercharging because you're afraid the client will say no

• Stop obsessively checking your accounts multiple times a day

You're not pretending the numbers don't matter.

You are refusing to let your worst-case anxiety run every decision.

Remember: Financial stress already steals mental bandwidth and decision quality. You are simply choosing not to donate extra energy to it.

This Week's Reflection

Which number—safety, stability, or expansion—am I willing to organize my next 90 days around?

And what does my nervous system say about that?

Write down:

1. The number

2. Three feelings you associate with it

3. Three actions that would naturally flow from that version of you

Let this be a conversation between your spreadsheets and your body—not a debate where your body always loses.

The Bottom Line

Your wealth is not just about how much you make.

It's about the relationship your system has with "enough."

When you define it clearly and anchor it somatically, you give your brain permission to stop scanning for danger every time you open your banking app—and start focusing on strategy again.

If you want support doing this work in community, this is exactly what we explore inside the 5-Day Wealth Activation. We're mapping your numbers and upgrading the part of you that decides what's possible.

Join the 5-Day Wealth Activation today

Lead with ease. Earn in alignment. And let "enough" become a place your body actually knows how to live.

Listen to the Full Episode

🎧 Listen to Episode 25: Designing Your "Enough" Number on Unapologetically In Power

About the Author

Jennifer Damaskos is a leadership coach and real estate investor who helps high-performing women build wealth from self-trust instead of self-sacrifice. Through her brand Unapologetically In Power, she blends neuroscience, identity work, and strategic frameworks to create lasting transformation—not just temporary motivation.

Connect with Jennifer:

🌐 jennifer-damaskos.mykajabi.com

📸 Instagram: @unapologeticallyinpower

🎙️ Podcast: Unapologetically In Power