You weren't born to be a box someone else could check.
You were born to evolve.
So why are you still living under someone else's definition of success?
Why are you still performing your bio instead of living your truth?
Welcome back to Unapologetically In Power—the podcast where we stop shape-shifting to fit other people's expectations and start leading, earning, and living by our own design.
I'm your host, Jennifer Damaskos. Businesswoman, investor, coach, and woman who has lived through more versions of herself than some people have job titles.
And if you're a high-performing woman who's tired of shrinking to make others comfortable while secretly wondering if you're allowed to want more—this space is for you.
Let's talk about the labels that shaped us.
Not the kind in your closet—the ones you wear in your identity.
"She's the reliable one."
"She's so easy to work with."
"She never rocks the boat."
"She's got it all together."
Some of us were labeled "mature" because we learned to anticipate everyone else's needs.
"Professional" because we mastered the art of being palatable.
"Successful" because we figured out how to over-deliver and under-ask.
According to research from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, women are significantly more likely to receive praise for traits like agreeableness and emotional regulation rather than ambition or assertiveness. We didn't just inherit labels—we inherited entire reward systems. And then we built our lives around them.
But here's what happens when you spend your twenties perfecting labels that don't fit:
You hit your thirties and realize you've been performing someone else's definition of success.
You look at your LinkedIn bio and think, "This sounds like someone I know... but it doesn't feel like me."
You're respected—but not remembered.
Known for being "easy to work with"—but not for being brilliant.
You've mastered the art of being impressive on paper while feeling invisible in rooms.
And those labels? They become scripts.
We end up choosing opportunities that match the mask.
Building relationships where our silence keeps everyone comfortable.
Dimming our voice to preserve an image that was never really ours.
It's not just exhausting—it's expensive.
Because every time you wear a label that doesn't fit, you shrink the room for who you actually are.
According to identity theory, when we internalize roles others assign to us—like the "team player," the "behind-the-scenes genius," or the "safe choice"—those roles become part of our self-concept. The deeper they're embedded, the harder they are to shed.
But here's the thing about inherited identity:
You start to see the cracks.
You feel unseen, even when you're in every meeting.
You say yes to projects that drain you, just to protect a reputation you didn't choose.
You watch women with less experience build personal brands while you're still perfecting your "professional" persona.
You become resentful—of others, but mostly of yourself—for staying silent when you have so much to say.
The breaking point? When you realize you've become really good at being who they need you to be... and completely disconnected from who you want to be.
I see this with my clients all the time.
The VP who's known for "executing flawlessly" but dreams of leading visionary strategy.
The consultant who's branded as "the details person" but wants to be the thought leader.
The entrepreneur who calls herself "practical" because "visionary" felt too bold.
But here's what I know:
When you stop accepting the labels others gave you and start choosing your own—everything shifts.
You stop asking for permission to be brilliant.
You start creating content that reflects your actual thoughts, not your practiced talking points.
You choose opportunities that energize you, not just ones that look good on paper.
You lead not just with competence, but with courage.
Unlearning who you had to be is the first step to becoming who you were meant to be.
The woman you're becoming? She's not "too much." She's not "intimidating."
She's integrated. She's powerful. She's unapologetic.
And she's ready to rewrite the narrative.
Here's your Power Prompt for this week:
Complete these sentences:
1. "I've been known as _______, but I'm actually _______."
2. "If I weren't afraid of being too much, I'd call myself _______."
3. "The label I'm ready to retire is _______."
Write them down. Get honest. Get specific.
Then cross out the old labels and write new ones—ones that reflect who you're becoming, not who you were told to be.
I track these insights in my Five Minute Journal from Intelligent Change—it gives my ambitious brain space to process without overwhelm.
Use code UNAPOLOGETIC10 for 10% off at intelligentchange.com.
You don't need permission to evolve.
You just need the courage to stop performing and start becoming.
If this episode hit different—
If you caught yourself thinking about the labels you've been carrying that don't belong to you—
Then I want you to do something radical this week.
Hit subscribe so you don't miss what's coming.
Share this episode with a woman who's been hiding her brilliance behind "professional" personas.
And most importantly—start introducing yourself differently.
Not with the bio you think people want to hear.
With the truth you're ready to own.
Because the woman you're becoming?
She's not born from a label.
She's born from the courage to be seen as she actually is.
🎵 **[Outro music fades in]**
This is Unapologetically In Power.
I'm Jennifer Damaskos—and this is your permission to rewrite the story.
