UIP- Episode 19: Authentic Leadership
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[00:00:00] This is unapologetically in Power, the podcast for ambitious women who are done performing and ready to lead from their unapologetic truth. I am Jennifer Damaskos and here. We don't play small in this space. We dismantle burnout, reclaim your energy and activate the unapologetic leader you are always meant to be, so you can lead, earn, and live from your unapologetic self.
Over the past few episodes, [00:01:00] we've peeled back layer after layer of what drives burnout, the shadows you didn't realize were running your business. The leaks that drain your energy, the boundaries that give you back your authority and the integration that makes it sustainable. But here's the next layer,
the one most high achieving women still stumble on even after doing all of that work, they're still leading through masks. Masks of professionalism that hide their real thoughts, masks of perfection that disconnect them from their teams and clients. Masks of being easy to work with, that sacrifice their vision, masks of being everything to everyone at the cost of their own power.
And here's the truth. Masks don't protect you. They suffocate you. They might have gotten you here, but they cannot take you where you're going. [00:02:00] Authentic leadership, unapologetic leadership is about leading without masks. It's about showing up as your whole self, not just the polished version. You think people will accept.
For years in corporate, I wore the perfect professional woman mask so tightly I forgot what my own voice even sounded like. I said the right things in meetings. I dressed the right way for client presentations. I kept the parts of me that were bold, fiery, intuitive, even human.
Completely hidden. It worked on paper. I looked successful. I had the promotions, the respect, the seat at the table, but behind the mask, I was numb. I was angry, I was suffocating. The breaking point came in what I now call my darkness season, I [00:03:00] realized I wasn't just dimming myself metaphorically. I was literally dimming the lights.
I stopped turning on the overhead lights in my office. I worked in near darkness lit only by the glow of my computer screen and the cabinet under lighting as if dimming the room could somehow make the mask easier to carry. And that's when I realized I wasn't leading, I was performing, and the cost of performance was my authenticity.
My energy and my power. When I started my business, I thought I'd left the mess behind. I thought I'd left the masks behind, but all I'd done was corporate masks for entrepreneurial ones.
The always available mask that had me answering emails at 11:00 PM the never too expensive mask that had me under [00:04:00] pricing to be accessible. The easy to work with mask that had me saying yes to scope creep, the perfect expert mask that kept me from admitting when I didn't have every answer.
The masks looked different, but the suffocation felt the same. The shift began when I asked myself. What if my real thoughts, my real boundaries, my real leadership style, were the very things my business needed most. And when I started leading from that place, saying what I actually thought, setting boundaries without apology, leading in alignment with my values showing up as my whole self, everything shifted.
My team trusted me more. My decisions became [00:05:00] clearer, my clients respected me more, and my business began to finally reflect me, not the version of me I thought was acceptable. The research is clear. Harvard Business Review 2023 says Authentic leaders are rated 40% more effective and experience less decision fatigue because their choices align with their values.
McKinsey in 2023 said Women who shed professional masks are 2.5 times more likely to report career satisfaction and significantly less likely to burn out. Stanford Research says Leaders who suppress parts of themselves to fit in lose up to 30% of their cognitive energy to self-monitoring instead of [00:06:00] innovation.
Dr. Brown's work says, clear, authentic leaders increase trust by 64% and reduce conflict by nearly half. The Journal of Applied Psychology in 2023 says, entrepreneurs who lead authentically attract more aligned clients and are less likely to struggle with imposter syndrome. The evidence is undeniable masks might create short-term safety, but authenticity creates long-term success.
So let's break this down. The most common masks, high achieving women wear, the first one would be the perfect expert mask. It's never admitting uncertainty over preparing, over researching, over delivering. It's costing delays, [00:07:00] missed opportunities, constant imposter syndrome. Then we have the always agreeable mask.
It's avoiding conflict, softening your voice or your standards. And the cost is weak, client fit, underperforming teams, and diluted leadership. The next one is the never too much mask, dimming your personality, hiding your boldness, underpricing, or downplaying your expertise. The cost is invisibility in a crowded market and clients who don't value your brilliance.
And the last, the endlessly available mask. It's immediate responses, weekends on call, emergencies that aren't emergencies and the cost. No focus for higher value work and endless burnout [00:08:00] cycles. When you lead with masks. You're performing when you lead with authenticity.
When you lead with authenticity, you're leading. So here's the mask audit for today. Step one is identify the mask. Where are you performing instead of leading. Which mask shows up most often for you. The next step is you have to name the cost and energy. How does it drain you to hold this mask in place?
Opportunity. What have you avoided because you were afraid of being too much trust. How does it affect your relationships when people sense they're not getting the real you? [00:09:00] The third step is you need to experiment with removal. So you choose one small place this week to consciously take the mask off.
Maybe it's stating your real opinion in a meeting. Maybe it's quoting the rate you actually want without justification. Maybe it's setting a boundary without over explaining. Then you have step four, anchoring the experience. Notice how you feel afterwards. Write it down. Something such as when I lead authentically, I gain blank.
Because authenticity compounds, the more you practice, the lighter it gets. And this is why Rise module two, reveal isn't just about shadows, leaks, and boundaries. It's about authenticity, integrating everything into [00:10:00] leadership that is unapologetically you. Inside module two, we go deeper into your authentic leadership map, spotting where you're still performing instead of leading mask.
Deconstruction tools, understanding how each mask formed and how to let it go. Authenticity anchors practices that make real leadership automatic instead of scary visibility strategies showing up in ways that reflect your truth, not someone else's expectations. Because when you lead authentically, your energy frees up.
Your leadership is trusted. Your business finally reflects who you really are. So let me ask you, where are you still wearing a mask? What is it costing you? An [00:11:00] energy in trust, in missed opportunities? And what would become possible if you led without apology, without performance, without fragmentation.
Masks may have kept you safe in the past, but they're suffocating your future. Every day you lead from behind a mask is a day you rob the world of your real leadership and the world doesn't need another perfect performer. It needs you. This is unapologetically in power. I'm Jennifer Damaskos, and your unapologetic authentic self is the most powerful leader you will ever be.
